The genteel reader may wish to skip this post.
A letter to the editor
Dear Editor:
In the June 22 issue of Newsweek I came upon an acronym which was unfamiliar to me. Suspecting my ignorance was age related I emailed a couple of younger friends. When they explained what MILF means I CFB it.
Paul Gibson
For the uninitiated MILF apparently means, "mother I’d like to fuck." It's a compliment.
Monday, July 6, 2009
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Talking to Strangers
1. A few years ago, upon her return from school one day, Beth reported that a youngster in her charge had said to her something like, "What? Do you just talk to anybody?" I think he was about 9. What she had said and to what stranger she said it, is lost in the mists of time.
2. I was recently seated at the Alki Bakery enjoying a fine vegetarian sandwich when I noticed two women meet, greet and then sit to eat. One of these had a great body. A few years ago I would have meant by this that she was a busty number, but now after a couple of years of humility training, and particularly this last quarter under the tutelage of a guy who is a competing body builder I mean that her stomach was flat, her bottom sagged not and her neck and shoulders, which were nicely revealed by the scoop neck blouse she wore, had every sign of a person who spends serious time in a gym. She was not under fed. She looked firm and strong. It might be that this look was simply a genetic gift except at her age, perhaps about 40, it seemed more likely the result of a lot of hard work. Earlier in the day I had seen a man wearing a tee shirt with the words, "This working out thing isn't working out." I'd say he was running about 265 and any muscle there was was well disguised. I spent the rest of my lunch wondering if I should say something to the woman about how well working out was working out for her. I went through a number of variations on how I might express my admiration without seeming like a sleazy old man, including beginning with a characterization of my marital status which I think is reasonably sound. In as much as I like talking to good looking young women (a cohort that now extends at least to age 45) I had a lot of difficulty sorting out my motivations. How much of this was an impulse to compliment something I actually admire and how much of it was a pitiful old man thing?
About half an hour later I came upon a guy walking up Jackson St., near Quest Field. His tee shirt sleeves rolled back from biceps approaching the size of cantaloupes. His thighs stretched the material of his pants. As I biked past I said, "Nice biceps".
"Thanks."
I suspect they represent a lot of work."
"You know it."
That's all the complimenting I did that day.
3. A couple of days ago I rode up to a red light and as I sometimes do, stopped. It was a Monday and tacked to the utility pole were two or three signs from the weekend announcing garage and yard sales. Also waiting at the light was a man about 50, well dressed in a shirt and slacks. It was near Green Lake where a big majority of those on the street are wearing some sort of athletic apparel. It's a long light. After a moment I said to him, "I could have a sale. My sigh would say 'Junk Sale'". He stared straight ahead.
2. I was recently seated at the Alki Bakery enjoying a fine vegetarian sandwich when I noticed two women meet, greet and then sit to eat. One of these had a great body. A few years ago I would have meant by this that she was a busty number, but now after a couple of years of humility training, and particularly this last quarter under the tutelage of a guy who is a competing body builder I mean that her stomach was flat, her bottom sagged not and her neck and shoulders, which were nicely revealed by the scoop neck blouse she wore, had every sign of a person who spends serious time in a gym. She was not under fed. She looked firm and strong. It might be that this look was simply a genetic gift except at her age, perhaps about 40, it seemed more likely the result of a lot of hard work. Earlier in the day I had seen a man wearing a tee shirt with the words, "This working out thing isn't working out." I'd say he was running about 265 and any muscle there was was well disguised. I spent the rest of my lunch wondering if I should say something to the woman about how well working out was working out for her. I went through a number of variations on how I might express my admiration without seeming like a sleazy old man, including beginning with a characterization of my marital status which I think is reasonably sound. In as much as I like talking to good looking young women (a cohort that now extends at least to age 45) I had a lot of difficulty sorting out my motivations. How much of this was an impulse to compliment something I actually admire and how much of it was a pitiful old man thing?
About half an hour later I came upon a guy walking up Jackson St., near Quest Field. His tee shirt sleeves rolled back from biceps approaching the size of cantaloupes. His thighs stretched the material of his pants. As I biked past I said, "Nice biceps".
"Thanks."
I suspect they represent a lot of work."
"You know it."
That's all the complimenting I did that day.
3. A couple of days ago I rode up to a red light and as I sometimes do, stopped. It was a Monday and tacked to the utility pole were two or three signs from the weekend announcing garage and yard sales. Also waiting at the light was a man about 50, well dressed in a shirt and slacks. It was near Green Lake where a big majority of those on the street are wearing some sort of athletic apparel. It's a long light. After a moment I said to him, "I could have a sale. My sigh would say 'Junk Sale'". He stared straight ahead.
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
A Photographic Anecdote
in which the author goes to the store for some staples and finds a useful item on the way home.
As explained elsewhere all the things you really need are out there on the road someplace waiting to be picked up.
As explained elsewhere all the things you really need are out there on the road someplace waiting to be picked up.
Monday, May 25, 2009
If Cows Could Talk
If cows could talk and you asked one to speak to you of God I wonder if she would reply that in the bible (the cow bible that is,I follow the Queen Elsie version here) it is written, "So God created cows in her own image and in the image of God created she them."
And if so you might say, "What????? You think God is somehow like a cow?????"
And the cow might reply, "Well what do you think, that God is somehow like a man, Her most flawed creation of all? Ha!"
"Well do you think cows are God's greatest creation?"
"No. Of course not. Her greatest creation was indirect. First she created grass. Then she created cows and gave them extra stomachs so that they could digest the grass and turn it into milk. Then, in order to make up for the mistake of creating human beings at all, she used that poor flawed beast to create the best thing ever which is, of course, ice cream."
It's 11:00 PM. I think I'll go have a little right now.
And if so you might say, "What????? You think God is somehow like a cow?????"
And the cow might reply, "Well what do you think, that God is somehow like a man, Her most flawed creation of all? Ha!"
"Well do you think cows are God's greatest creation?"
"No. Of course not. Her greatest creation was indirect. First she created grass. Then she created cows and gave them extra stomachs so that they could digest the grass and turn it into milk. Then, in order to make up for the mistake of creating human beings at all, she used that poor flawed beast to create the best thing ever which is, of course, ice cream."
It's 11:00 PM. I think I'll go have a little right now.
Monday, May 18, 2009
Someone should tell Nancy Pelosi that one of her tits is hovering about 1/4 inch from the wringer
Of the preceding nine Speakers of the House, dating back to Joe Martin (1953-55), six have ended their careers under the shadow of scandal, or in one case (Tom Foley) losing his seat while actually being the Speaker. This does not include Trent Lott, who was Senate Majority Leader, or Wilbur Mills who was merely Chair of the Ways and Means Committee.
"Whom the Gods would destroy, they first make proud", or something like that.
"Whom the Gods would destroy, they first make proud", or something like that.
Friday, May 15, 2009
The Fly
Today, at the age of 70 years, 10 and 2/3 months I caught a fly. Out of the air. With my hand. When you think about it, it's a little sad.
He must have been a pretty old fly.
He must have been a pretty old fly.
Saturday, May 9, 2009
Blame
I was startled this morning when it occurred to me that there was a time when the most embarrassing thing about the Bush administration was the Enron scandal. Can you remember back that far? Wow.
But my point here is not that George W Bush led an administration so bad that, what was once thought to be a huge scandal, is at the end, barely remembered. My point is rather that the blame goes beyond Mr Bush himself. I don't think at the time of his candidacy George Bush was an unknowable character. The attributes and predispositions which led to the fiasco of his administration were knowable in 2000. The sad and undeniable fact is that he was elected, sort of. For sure the second time. So who else is responsible? Certainly the annointers of the Republican party who gave him the nomination. And then there are the Supremes who overlooked their usual and long standing position against federal courts interfering in state issues, to dictate the outcome of the Florida voting process. And finally there is the national electorate. We got him because we wanted him, or, for the rest of us, because we didn't do enough to not get him. It's a sobering thought.
But my point here is not that George W Bush led an administration so bad that, what was once thought to be a huge scandal, is at the end, barely remembered. My point is rather that the blame goes beyond Mr Bush himself. I don't think at the time of his candidacy George Bush was an unknowable character. The attributes and predispositions which led to the fiasco of his administration were knowable in 2000. The sad and undeniable fact is that he was elected, sort of. For sure the second time. So who else is responsible? Certainly the annointers of the Republican party who gave him the nomination. And then there are the Supremes who overlooked their usual and long standing position against federal courts interfering in state issues, to dictate the outcome of the Florida voting process. And finally there is the national electorate. We got him because we wanted him, or, for the rest of us, because we didn't do enough to not get him. It's a sobering thought.
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